3. When I was 14, my mom got us a kitten from the pound. He would climb under the covers with me in bed at night. I trained him to lick my pussy by putting butter on my labia, though after a while he would just do it on his own, without butter or prompting. He did it for years and years, even doing it when I would visit home from college. I always worried whether he tried to do it to others in my family.
7. For a long while before I bought my first vibrator, I would go into the bathroom, lock the door, turn on the shower, sit on the sink, and use my father's electric toothbrush to get myself off. I always washed it off very thoroughly after. I don't have a lot of sexual shame but this is one of the things that I sort of regret in retrospect.
12. I love the smell of a boy's unwashed scalp. Sometimes I like to pretend that I'm giving head massages, but really I'm just scraping remnants of their scent onto my fingers, so I can smell it later.
---- http://25thingsaboutmysexuality.blogspot.com
Today, I was sitting in class and I fell asleep during the lesson. I was wearing sweatpants and had an erection. My teacher came up to me and grabbed my penis. She thought it was my phone. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I don't like his facial hair and that he should shave it off. He replied, "You first." FML
Today, I was standing in the parking lot with my sister, after my aunt's funeral, when my grandma walks up and says to my sister, "You're the one going places in life, I'm proud to have you as a grand daughter." She then looked at me, and walked away. FML
Today, I heard my sister masturbating in her room. I took the dog around the block to get out of the house, and I came back to see her leaving her room... my electric toothbrush in her hand. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. When he was about to orgasm, he screamed "Yes Brittany!" at the top of his lungs. My name's not Brittany. That's his sister. FML
Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML
Today, my mom walked in on me looking at a 1978 playboy. She asked if I found it in the basement. I said yes. Then I realized she was the centerfold. FML
Fuck My Life
At first it was an incredibly ackward situation. I have never had a man wax me before, so getting a brazillian was very embarrassing. You are so beautiful and I was sure you were gay. However once I took my pants off, your eyes told me otherwise. I'm not sure if it was my bulging pubic hair or the fact that I hadn't showered in 2 days, but whatever it was, I knew you were into it. Getting waxed, especially there, is never fun, but having you control my pain was soo hot. You were so gentle one minute and so rough the next. It was perfect. Being so close, I'm sure you could see just how much I enjoyed it. Chances are you'll never read this, but just in case!! What was the tatoo on my labia?
^craigslist
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